Summer Reading: Guest Post: When Slow is Fast Enough

Today’s guest post is written by my good friend Jennifer over at The Fairy Mum. Her post reiterates the importance of encouraging a child to read while allowing her to approach each new level of the reading challenge at her own pace. Of course, this is easier said than done…

Being patient with each child’s learning process is a worthy, yet very difficult thing to come by. Even as I have researched and believed in letting a child set the pace for these initial learning skills (reading, writing, basic math), it is very, very hard not to compare and contrast with other children, other parents, other “successes.” Sigh. My desire to allow each of my children to develop their own interests, to grow in their own desire to learn, and to discover the joy of … reading, for example, has been infinitely harder when their pace has been slower than my own hopes for them.

With both my older children, I have despaired of them ever learning to read, and more importantly, with learning to love reading on their own. Waiting for them to make not only the mental connections necessary, but also to find the inherent joy in reading, has been so hard! As a confirmed bookworm since my youngest days, I have longed for my dream of the family sitting in bed, all devouring our own books. As an introvert, I’ve craved the peace of each of us reading, alone, yet together. And as a mother, I have yearned to see each of my older children discover the friendships, and adventures that occur so uniquely within the pages of a great book.

Despite my apparent patience (and my near constant mantra – to myself and to those who questioned my methods – “they will learn when they are ready, and then they will love it!”), I was chafing and worrying. And yet, the day it clicked with Sterling (I can still remember – we had just moved into our latest house, and he went from reading “C-a-t” phonetically to reading Magic Tree House in about three days), it was as if a miracle had occurred. Sigh of relief. Later than I would have thought (he was 7.5 for those of you out their with any other later readers), it did finally happen, and two years later he is reading thick novels and devouring books like they are the treat they have always been for me. Sigh of happiness.

And now my second child, Siena. Nearly the same age now as Sterling was then, the click came just two weeks ago. She has been sounding out complex words for months, struggling to enjoy the process, doubtful that she would ever “read” (which in turn made me want to doubt too). Her peers in our local homeschooling group are reading at upper grade levels, and I (and my pride) have been struggling to allow her the space to develop as she will… while hopefully still allowing it.

And then that week! A trip to the library, and I sent her to the “I can read” section of books, thinking she would, once again, borrow a few, and then claim she couldn’t read them, and we’d just struggle along some more. Deep breath for the book loving Mum. But she found a series of books that, for whatever reason, struck her fancy, and before the afternoon was out, she’d read two of them. The next day she read four more. We made a special trip back to the library, checking out yet more, and, suddenly – dare I say miraculously? – the click had happened. She was ready to pick up other, harder stories, and work through them, now that she knows the joy of reading from cover to cover. I’d like to take credit for teaching her with such great skill, or with at least being patient, but honestly, I think one of the keys, aside from the simple level of writing, was the humor – she found something funny, and that sent her to giggles, which got her well past any challenging words. Sigh of great joy.

And now? “Can we read for school today?” doesn’t just mean, “Mum, read to us” anymore! And during a quiet moment at Great-Grandma’s? There she is, snuggled up in the sun, meeting Anne again. Sighs of contentment, all around.